Happy birthday, Eric Burns-White. Next time, remind us ahead of time, huh? I only really noticed an hour or so ago.
Corporeal Forces: 2 Strength: 4 Agility: 4
Ethereal Forces: 3 Intelligence: 8 Precision: 4
Celestial Forces: 4 Will: 4 Perception: 12
Skills: Area Knowledge (The Marches), Artistry/1 (webcomics), Dream-Shaping/3, Emote/2, Knowledge (History of the Marches/3, Omens/3, Psychology/2, Webcomics/6), Move Silently/1, Survival/3 (Marches)
Songs: Dreams (All/4), Healing (Ethereal/2, Celestial/1), Light (Corporeal/1), Projection (Ethereal/1), Shields (All/3), Tongues (Ethereal/1)
Elements: Information: Wisdom (Primary); Emotions: Laziness (Secondary)
Affinities: Divination (strong); Books (moderate); Obscurement (moderate)
Dread: Updating (Uncommon/3)
Ph'ngloungi mglw'nap Snarky Websnark wgah'nagl zzztagn
"In his Comfy Chair at Websnark dozy Snarky chills, snoozing."
The greatest oracle of the Marches; rumored to have counseled Archangels and Demon Princes, gods and madmen, heretics, saints, sinners, generals and privates, the curious and the incurious, the clever and the foolish, and sometimes even the bland. He supposedly knows all: the names of all the Mysteries, the price of a Dream, and even what makes the heart of a statue dance. They say that his gaze can drown the recipient in a sea of visitation and regard; that his passing calls forth startled chatter from the very ground itself; and that around his neck he holds the key to the Pivot of the Week. Or perhaps that it his heart that is in keeping of the Pivot's mistress; there are many legends that flow from him, and no doubt not a few are even true. He is, in fact, himself a legend.
The trick is to get him out of that blessed chair.
It's like there's some sort of karma going on here: with great power comes great just-five-more-minutes. It's not as if you have to actually, well, kick him awake or anything once you come before the Comfy Chair for a divination; he'll be happy to perform a divination to anybody who isn't nasty and who is nice. It's just that finding the Comfy Chair is an adventure in of itself. Many researchers suspect that the Comfy Chair is somehow sentient, and has its own opinions on what can and should be considered sufficiently important to bother either it, or the august person that it bears; which effectively means those that go looking for Snarky had best pack a lunch. Except when it they don't: the ethereal seems to be in tune with several deep themes of the Symphony (some have even whispered that he knows, if only from afar, the smell of the Almighty strand) - and that means that he may at any time become an accessible font of quirky yet useful wisdom and true sight. Until he stops, and everything resets again.
Hey. It's not like he's a tame sleeping green dinosaur.